I am a city girl and I am way being too comfortable in my apartment in Bandung. I felt like I was living on autopilot for years. I love Bandung because it is a lovely city surrounded by nature and I love the cool breeze so I can sleep without an AC. Bandung has served me very well and it is time for me to relocate to a new island.
Usually, people moved because they didn’t like where they are. But I have learned my lesson that to start a new journey, I need to end the previous one with…
There is one thing that I never stop doing and learning since 2 years ago. The breeze of awareness keeps calling me no matter what. It’s coming from the dark cave inside — my higher self is showing me the path that I’m yearning for.
I have a black dress that’s written, “Had a flashback of something that never existed.” It was my old dress before I knew what awakening is. Every time I wear the dress, I feel that I am on the right path regardless of any situation.
Everybody is going through the same process in life. We…
Aren’t we familiar with these quotes :
“ Don’t search for money, search for happiness.”
“ Do the things that make you happy.”
“ Happiness is the best make-up a woman can wear.”
“ Happiness is the secret to all beauty.”
“ How are you? Oh, I am happy!”
We are all wired to want to feel good, to feel happy, and it is our innate instinct to avoid or disown our “negative” emotions. When we’re not happy, our minds create a narrative that whispers that there is something wrong in a subtle way. Words have a multitude of meanings…
I found her on Instagram when I was in deep depression and looking for some healing and support. She has a lot of fire and passion in this healing industry. She has an altar, crystals, ancient things, feathers, healing musical instruments, a website, and a couple of hundred dollars healing course.
As someone who was in hopeless mode, it was so easy to be permeated with something that looks promising. In seconds, I was hooked by her persona and it felt so good to feel those spikes of excitement. …
Everybody has the free will to do anything they want. This is a free-will world. Your husband has free will by not wanting to talk about some issues because he just doesn’t want to feel it. Your parents have free will always to give unsolicited advice and want to control your life.
Your friend has free will to play with her phone while dining with you and makes you less special. Your children have free will to be angry without telling you the reason and make you frustrated. Your in-laws have free will for bad-mouthing you.
Some writers have the…
I get it. When we felt like we have overcome something, suddenly we got smacked down again. At this point, my knee-jerk reaction was, “Really, God? Again? Can you give me a break and at least reward me with something nice?
I felt worn out and tired mentally and physically. Usually, I am calmer and cool when handling difficult situations. But now I just want to be a regular human being. To be angry and victimized myself, for god sake.
It felt like I have reached my limit. Or it is just the universe that wants to upgrade me and…
I remember my mother said to me, “Just forgive him, for he didn’t know what he was doing,” when I told her that I wasn’t happy in my marriage. My mother is a catholic, so she always recites that.
It took me 3 years to completely forgive my ex-husband, who is just a wounded little boy that never been loved. A few days ago, he did a dramatic scene in front of our children. …
A mother yelled at her daughter because she refused to eat — She uses anger to make the daughter obey her.
People condemning others that don’t wear a mask in the street/open-air — They are spitting bullets of fear/threat.
A woman is bad-mouthing another woman — She wants others to hate the same woman so she can be the “right” one (trauma response).
People go to other people's Instagram and make a nasty comment — They felt triggered and become reactive.
A woman uses sex and a baby to hook the partner — She manipulates him through the back door.
It is a painful pill to swallow especially when we are in pain. This kind of statement can invoke anger in people because we don’t want to take accountability to look inward. We want the easy route — pointing the finger is easy. It’s the knee-jerk reaction that is embedded in our DNA.
When we are still unawakened, we will see things as separate from us. Therefore, anything that invokes negative reactions, we will easily be implicating it onto the other.
I used to blame my ex-husband because he brings so much suffering in me for years. I used to…
I have been paralyzed for the last two weeks. I can’t write — I don’t know what to write and how to find the words. I even think that I want to stop writing because I suck at it (thank god I’m not). Headaches seem to nest in me. I can’t find the flow even though I’ve experienced a lot of heavy emotions.
I don’t do much except strolling mindlessly through Instagram, binge eating, and pitying myself. I wondered why life was always fu*king with me while I was already doing everything I could to heal and expand.